Mick (micklawson) wrote in uk_cell,
Mick
micklawson
uk_cell

some proposals, lol.

Right, May I propose a few changes to our topsey-Turvey world?

1) If I Sign up to the gym, they suggest I wear loose fitting clothes, Do they realy think I'd have signed up if I had any?

2) Morality should be monitored closely, I use the idea that if electricity comes from the movement of electrons, Morality must come from the movement of morons?

3) I think a whole load of people would be less scared of flying if a) The airport was no longer called a "Terminal" and b) they made the whole plane from that indestructable stuff they bake just the "Black box" from.

4) Peaople complain about the rodent problem in towns and cities, yet try as I might, I still cannot find mouse flavoured cat food, only food made from animals my cat would have no chance of catching in the wild.

5) I propose Dyslexia be shortenned so sufferers may have a hope in hell of spelling their affliction, and Lisp be spelt with a "t h" in place of the s, just in case the afflicted need to describe their problem verbaly.

6) I believe that when you employ a doctor, he/she should have practised enough to do the job you pay him/her to do.

7) All fridges should come with a proximity sensor, and a large flashing display to point out that no new food has materialised since your last visit 3 minutes ago.

8) Pay per view Binoculars on tall buildings should be banned, come on, you pay to go up the building then you pay to use the binoculars or telescope to see stuff on the ground!

9) All toasters should be built without that "Burn bread to a crisp" function everyone only finds by accident and realy is only a good test for your smoke alarms that are so sensitive they work when the toaster has hardly made your bread golden brown.

10) I suggest all members write to the rubbish sack manufacturers suggesting they print "opens this end" on one end of the sack, It'd save us a whole load of time.

11) When you go to the ballet, remember to complain to the producer, these kids hurt their feet dancing on tippy toe, suggest he/she gets taller dancers for the job.

just a few of my more "sensible suggestions" I hope we can begin to implement at least some of them. :)

Xposted to micklawson and uk_cell
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